I am convinced time runs faster on Monday mornings. The alarm was set at 7:30 as usual, but, by the time I reached the toilet’s door, it was already one hour later (?!). I rushed into the metro for my daily commute stepping on my scarf and compulsively saying pardon to everyone I hit on the way. A few seconds before reaching Concorde station, I closed my eyes. No, I didn’t fall asleep. I was playing a game. Concorde is my favourite metro station. It’s like being reduced to Arial 10 and fired inside a Google Doc. The walls are covered by thousands of navy blue signs forming a giant letter soup. “When I open my eyes, the first word I notice will rule my day” I said to myself.
Hommes. Well, well, blessing or nightmare? I laughed out loud and covered my mouth almost immediately. Not fast enough to avoid a judgy look from the ridiculously professional, suited-up homme standing next to me. He looked so clean and responsible. An adult from head (perfectly combed back with grease) to toes. And I felt like a brat, I was even chewing strawberry gum for God’s sake. The contrast shook my brain, screaming like the Munch painting. I was puzzled: was I still a teenager?
The most trusted source of all times, Wikipedia (alerting all units: she hasn’t stopped checking it since high school), defines adolescence as a transitional stage of physical and psychological development that generally occurs during the period from puberty to adulthood. I think we can all agree I am physically developed, although my teeth still have those childish zig-zag ends. And then there’s the psychological part. To be fair to myself I drafted a list of things I do as an adult vs. things I do as a teenager.
One point to adulthood for those times (exactly two times) I bought double the amount of groceries “just in case”. If that’s not grown-up conduct, I don’t know what is. A point to teenager behaviour for breaking the record on the amount of time a human being can survive with no toilet paper. Extra half point for the creative alternatives found to replace it. Another point to adulthood (does this remind you of Eurovision too?) for that time my coffee machine showed an alarming orange light and I actually went through the instructions to find out how to solve it. Have I taken action yet? No. But who the hell knows where to buy descaling liquid anyway. It’s definitely a teenage thing to eat retro food from one’s childhood. And I specifically mean animal-shaped cookies and cute fish sticks. What can I say? They’re delicious and involve zero cooking skills. Shamefully checking that one too.
After a couple of days of exhausting research (how tough is the blogger life?) I came to the conclusion that I am more of an adolescent than I thought. I am fairly independent (at least financially) but now and then, I also feel lost. I have a reckless approach to risk, a serious addiction to social media, Y2K movies and overpriced manicures. Now, if you're in the same situation as me, don’t panic. The world knows growing up is slowing down. History has been kind to us, so we are taking a slow life strategy, (smartly) delaying the transition to more adult behaviours. We have time to think, be creative and follow our passions. Thirties are officially the new twenties. We might not get that six-pack so easily but we can buy cocktails with our own money. So, by all means, and without a doubt: keep chewing gum and playing games.
After all, who doesn’t want to cling onto the hectic days of youth for as long as possible?